With any personal tragedy, a person has to go through a period of psychological adjustment in order to accept his loss.  The person with a spinal cord has not only lost the use of part of his body but has also lost many of the important aspects of his life. His independence, job, sexual life and self-image are threatened.  It takes time to accept these losses and most patients go through various periods of emotional change in order to do so.

For the first few weeks the person often completely deny that his injury and disability is anything but a temporary situation, despite what anyone tells him.  The denial should not be discouraged or encouraged.  Few people can face such a loss immediately, but eventually come to accept their injury.

As the period of denial comes to an end, grief will often overtake the patient.  He may feel so useless and helpless as to want to die.  Grief overwhelms him, and nothing anyone can do will cheer him up.  He may ask his family and friends to leave him because he feels no good to anyone.  At this time general support and reassurance should be given, and the patient encouraged to talk about his feelings.

Eventually the person will usually become understandably angry.  Everyone and everything will be at fault for his problem.  He can become hostile and belligerent.  This anger should not be taken personally however difficult this may be.  It has been building up for some time and must be released for their well being.  It is after this stage that he will come to accept his injury and begin to make progress in making a new life for himself.  The above stages of denial, grief, and anger are only general guidelines of what the person with a spinal cord may go through.  Most people will go through the stages in their own way.  A stage could be skipped or unusually long.  They may be in different order.  Accepting his injury doesn't mean that he won't have periods of anger or depression like everyone else.